THAT NEW BRA FEELING+WAYS TO PUSH UP THE HAPPY FACTOR AT WORK

I am really afraid to put this out there for fear of what you might think of me.  But I'm doing it anyway, living up to my credo that we only have one life on this planet and we have to whoop it up.  Being authentic is part of it, and I'm playing with it.

A few years ago, back when I worked for E! Entertainment Television in Los Angeles, I was involved in a sexual harassment case. I was 28 years old, in management with a staff of six writer/producers, several associate producers, a few production assistants, an intern, and multiple freelancers.  We created great promotional commercials with every major celebrity saying E!, entertainment television!  I sat in meetings with Joan Rivers and discussed the best ways to promote Fashion Police.  I was part of the Howard Stern on TV effort.  I did red carpet interviews.  It was a blast until one day an editor threw a tape at our intern.

I went through the proper procedures and filed a report with Human Resources.  As a result, the editor was put on the overnight shift.  In some kind of retaliation move, a few months later, he complained to HR that I sexually harassed him.  There was a big meeting in the President of Human Resources office with several other management team members.  They took the complaint seriously.  There would be a full investigation.  I was never to be alone with him.  Each member of my staff would be interviewed.  Personal questions would be asked.

 I told the President of Human Resources that if I wanted to risk my job and harass someone, he would have to be really good looking, not look like a little troll.  Well, that didn't go over well.  His claim was that I put my "boobs" on his back and I told him to make edits.  After laughing off my chair, I stuck out my chest revealing that I'm not a Double D, and I would have to be really close to him, practically lying on him to have my breasty dumplings on his back. If I was on his back, he would not be able to make an edit because the sheer weight of my body would inhibit his ability to push buttons.  That CSI analysis didn't fly.

Finally, I told them I was not so much offended for being accused of sexual harassment, but offended for anyone thinking I would lower my standards to use my "girls" without being paid or having a magazine spread.   I mean, jeez, what'd they take me for?!

An investigation ensued for 3 months with my staff to determine if I was "inappropriate."  Everyone was looking at my lady pillows.  My boulder holders had enough padding, they could have been used as a flotation device.  I bought new bras because it embarrassed the Victoria Secrets right out of me.  I minimized.  I felt small.  I could go on and on about the trials and tribulations of crying my eyes out in the parking lot before I went into work every day, practicing my mantra that "I am bigger than this!," holding my head high while feeling humiliated, and trying my darndest to be the most "appropriate" employee of all time.

Lo and behold, after three months, I was found innocent and everyone carried on their merry way.  Except I was left with a feeling of being abused and did what any self-righteous, innocent woman would do.  I immediately went to the lingerie department and bought the whole lot of Betsy Johnson brassieres.  There's nothing like that new bra feeling!

As I reflect on how I remained a joy-filled person during that ordeal, truths to creating happiness at work are revealed. I've been employed by large corporations such as Viacom, CBS, Showtime, Comcast, E!, Turner Broadcasting.  I've been a member of small production companies.  Now I am an entrepreneur.  According to Forbes, the traditional gold standard for measuring professional success is money, yet happiness seems to be highest-priority goal for feeling successful.  An oft-cited study by Stanford University economist Angus Deaton and psychologist Daniel Kahneman indicates that once you’re pulling in a salary of $75,000, any additional dollar earned does nothing more to increase personal life satisfaction.  Put that in your lingerie drawer and scent it.  Here are some things I do make work a joyriding adventure, even with the bumps along the way.

Truths to Push Up the Happiness Factor at Work

Move your body at work. Schedule walking meetings and phone calls.  Sitting is the new smoking.  Set an alarm for every 50 minutes to get off your tush and shake it.   We had a snow day yesterday and I played "Just Dance" with my daughter.  I'm inspired to do four dances during the day to get in an extra 20 minutes of exercise in the privacy of my playroom.  And, I'll have the moves to prove it. 

Schedule activities that bring you joy.  Schedule things that make you happy.  Lunch with your lover.  Coffee with a friend. Shake your body at Zumba class.  Walk to get an ice cream.  Take a weekly shopping break.  Get a massage every two weeks.  Mani/Pedi every Friday with a girlfriend.  Have dance breaks to get you off your tush.  Once these "happy blasts" are on my calendar, I follow through.

Get out of the Judger's Pit.  At work, there is bound to be things that do not go as expected or envisioned.  Try not to go negative.  There are more negative words than positive.  According to a study at Penn State, "half of all the words that people produce from their working vocabulary to express emotion are negative. And 30 percent are positive and 20 percent are neutral."  The Choice Map provides tools to switch lanes when the proverbial "shit hits the fan."

Get more sleep.  After a sleepless night, you may be more irritable, short-tempered, and vulnerable to stress.  Enough said!

Create a social circle of like-minded business people.  Commit to creating a circle of like-minded business "friends" in which no money is exchanged between members.  Use the group to brainstorm ideas, explore ways to achieve goals, and be accountable to someone outside of "work."  My group is called the Gold Bikinis and we have calls every Monday to brag about what we have accomplished, give gratitude for what we have, and state our desires for what we want.  This pic was a slumber party we had in December.  No one was wearing a gold bikini, but we could.

Help someone EVERY DAY.  Check in with a friend who is having a tough time, mentor a colleague, call your mother and listen, volunteer, pay for someone's coffee in line in front of you.  From Forbes, Professor Cassie Mogilner, a researcher on happiness and time management at the Wharton School, explained this study recently, “The results show that giving your time to others can make you feel more ‘time affluent’ and less time-constrained than wasting your time, spending it on yourself, or even getting a windfall of free time.”
Whether it be through mentorship, volunteering, showing interest, or lending an ear to a friend, giving time to others expands your sense of time and results in greater life satisfaction.  Random Acts of Kindness Week is just before Valentine's Day but you get bonus points in heaven for doing it when it's not a national "holiday!"

Reflect about the things you’re grateful for.  I often forget how much is accomplished and sometimes get bummed that things are not moving as fast as I'd like.  I am building a gratitude board, like a vision board, but with all my achievements from the last year.  It will also have a section of what is upcoming so that when I get the blues, I can whistle while I work, padded bra, and all.

 

Designs by my friend and artist Tara Dixon http://gratitudedesigns.com/products/